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03.31.04 "Scared"
I don't usually have nightmares, but I had one
last week. I was on my old street in North Vancouver and I was
with a man that I knew I shouldn't be with. Details were hazy,
but I think I had just busted him for something (maybe I was some
kind of cop?) but then I was having a casual conversation with
him. As soon as I realized that I might be in danger, he
started intimidating me and trying to push me to the ground.
I fought back, but in my dream I wasn't being very
effective (e.g. my punches were slow, my screams weren't loud).
I woke up very frightened.
Interpretation:
Yet again, I think it was a work intimidation dream (yes, still a bit
stressed). So, I'm not going to go into it too much. But
it was so real and scary. Thank goodness Robin was there when I
woke up.
03.23.04 "No Dreams For You!"
I haven't really been having many dreams
lately. The reason is that I've been having terrible allergies
(hay fever). I've been waking up every 2 hours or so, unable
to breathe. It's hell.
03.19.04 "Unfaithful"
I shouldn't do this, but I'm going to talk about
Robin's dreams that he's been having lately, mainly because they've
been affecting my dreams. He's had a couple lately where I've
cheated on him, and he's woken up very distressed. Well, last
night I dreamt that I was in a situation where it appeared that I
was cheating on him (I was in my bedroom with one of my more
attractive co-workers, but we were reviewing work documents - all
business). Robin walked in on us and was upset, but I was calm
because I knew it was all innocent.
Interpretation:
Dreaming that your partner is cheating on you indicates a fear of
abandonment. And just last night, Robin and I were talking about
how we rarely see each other during the week. He kept saying it
was because I'm too busy, but I think we're both equally occupied
during the week. I re-assured him that I would like to see him
more often, hence my calm reaction in the dream. When I see him
tonight, I'm doing to give him a BIG hug.
03.15.04 "Cujo and Taxicabs"
I had pretty fragmented dreams last night, and
only remembered bits and pieces. There was one part that
involved some vicious dogs trying to attack me, but I remained calm
and the situation worked out (they turned into people, and I
reasoned with them). I also remember one sequence where I was
looking for Robin to say good-bye, so I ran out in the street,
opened a taxicab door and found Robin in there in his work
clothes. I kissed him good-bye, and wished him a good
day. I wasn't stressed, and somehow knew I'd find him there.
Interpretation:
Attacking dogs can represent an inability to balance aspects of my
life. This probably reflects my current stressful work
situation. But the fact that it got under control is optimistic
- if I'm reasonable about things (i.e. not take on too much), then
I'll resolve things. Being in a taxi represents satisfaction
with life in general. Finding Robin in there is a good
sign. Things are going well lately, and I hope it continues on
this path.
03.13.04 "A Smelly Job"
Last night's dream really put things in
perspective for me. I dreamt I got a phone message at work
from one of our Executive VPs telling me to go see HR. I was
very nervous - I thought I had done something wrong, that I had
screwed up somehow. When I got to HR, Kirsten told me that
they needed my help because someone was smelling up the women's
washrooms and they needed me to do some detective work and try to
find the culprit. I was relieved that I wasn't in trouble, and
I thought the request was quite humorous.
Interpretation:
Yesterday I was quite stressed out about work and my new
responsibilities. I've gotten good feedback, but I fear that I'm
'screwing up' somehow (even though I've been thrown in the middle of a
project and told to manage it, and I've had minimal guidance).
So, I think my dream was just telling me that I'm basically being
ridiculous and paranoid, and I need to lighten up a bit. And
that's totally true!
03.12.04 "Mark and his Jammies"
Last night was a bit of an anxiety dream. I
dreamt I was trying to make it to a meeting at work, but I kept
running into obstacles. One of the obstacles involved my pen
running out of ink so I traipsed all around the building looking for
a new pen. Also when I initially walked into the meeting room,
Mark was there as a new employee with my company. He was in
his pajamas (flannels), and everyone else that walked into the
meeting room was also wearing jammies. They were laughing and
relaxed, but I was uptight and anxious.
Interpretation:
This is totally a reflection of my work day yesterday. I was
feeling anxious about my new responsibilities at work, and I attended
a conference call meeting yesterday where everyone knew what was going
on whereas I was the new person (i.e. they were comfortable in their
jammies, but I was anxious). Mark being in my dream as a
co-worker could be explained by the fact that there was someone in
yesterday's meeting who reminded me of him. But the fact that I
was doing a ridiculous amount of running around just to find a pen - I
think that speaks to the fact that I'm blowing things out of
proportion again, and need to chill out. Time to do more yoga
now.
03.06.04 "Public Nakedness"
It was a full moon Saturday - that explains the bizarre
dreams. One that I remember vividly involved me and and
ex. We were waiting to enter a building (school?), there were
many people around. For whatever reason, I started stripping
off my clothes, right down to my underwear only. Then, we
started running through the hallways looking for something. I
didn't even care that I was exposed (or running naked for that
matter) - I felt fine, very focused.
Interpretation:
I don't have
public nudity dreams very often. It's no surprise that such a
dream represents the fear of being judged.
BUT, because I was comfortable means that I'm
ok with being 'exposed' and coming clean with whatever less than
desirable activities I've gotten myself tangled up with. And I
think I know what the exposed issue is - earlier that day, my mother
offered to help me out (monetarily) to buy my condo (yay
Mommy!). At first I was hesitant, and I admit part of it was
because I didn't want people to think that I'm getting things 'handed
to me.' But in the end I decided I'd probably take her up on
that generous offer, and to hell with people if they're going to judge
me.
03.05.04 "Putting out the Fire"
I dreamt that I was at an office building and there were a bunch
of fires. The sprinklers were going off, and I was running
around making sure the fires were put out properly (I also had a
water bottle thing that I was using). In the end, all was
good. Everyone around me was really calm too, and I wasn't
terribly stressed.
Interpretation:
Fire represents
many things. In this case since the fire was contained and I was
helping to put it out, it represents inner drive and transformation,
and that I will overcome my obstacles with much work and effort.
I think this is an accurate synopsis of
what's been happening with work lately. I've taken on some new
projects at work and I'm very motivated. I've been given
additional responsibilities, and I'm up to the challenge. I have
the potential to excel and really test my abilities and prove myself.
03.04.04 "Door Buzzers and Confusion"
I haven't had a very memorable dream lately. And even last
night's was a little hazy. I dreamt that I was at Brent's
building (but it looked different, of course) and I was trying to
buzz him. However, the numbers on the display pad weren't
mapped to the correct apartments. There was a whole bunch of
people waiting to get in, so they just entered the building when
somebody left the building (took advantage of the open door).
But since I knew that I couldn't access the elevator without Brent
actually buzzing me in, I held back. I got a hold of him on my
cell phone, and he was going to run down and let me in. My mood
was calm, not really stressed.
Interpretation:
Doorbells (i.e.
building buzzers) indicate that I'm open to new experiences. It
could also mean that I've overlooked something, and I do not realize
that there is an opportunity open to me.
Lately I've been excited about my job
developments and thinking where that might take me (maybe travel
again?). Also I've been pondering my relationship future,
daydreaming about different paths my life might take in the next few
years if I choose to make any changes or decisions and make it
happen.
But I think this dream represents my cautious
nature in general. I was wise to wait to contact Brent, or I
would not have been able to access the elevator. In other words,
even though there are potential opportunities out there, I should
exercise caution before jumping into anything.
02.25.04 "Darn That Mark!"
So, yesterday Mark was telling us about a
dream that he had (about a dog jumping up on him) and how he woke up
frustrated. He asked us, "Do you guys ever have those
types of dreams, and then wake up totally irritated and in a bad
mood?"
Well, last night I had one of those
dreams. I dreamt I called Robin and Mark was there. Robin
wasn't talking, and instead handed the phone to Mark who apologized on
his behalf.
I woke up at 6am feeling frustrated.
But thankfully the feeling didn't stick with me....
02.24.04 "Bunnies Galore"
I haven't been remembering my dreams lately. But I do
recall a vivid dream that I had a couple of months ago. It was
night time (very dark), and Robin and I were walking along a
road. We were crossing a ditch, and it was full of white
rabbits. They were so cute! Robin confidently walked
through them, but I remember gingerly stepping between them, being
careful not to crush them. At one point, I remember one bunny
started licking my bare ankle. It was ticklish in a good way. Interpretation:
Apparently, rabbits typically represent good fortune and can
symbolize sexual activity (yowza!). To see a white rabbit
signifies faithfulness of a lover. I
loved this dream! It was one of my favourites in a long
time. I think I know why it made me feel good - I saw a great
number of white rabbits, symbolizing a solid trust in my boyfriend's
faithfulness. This is true. At first I might have been
hesitant about us, but I am very pleased with our current
status. His confidence in the dream was also assuring, as it
is in the waking world. In addition, the sexual reference in
the dream applies to real life as well....
02.20.04 "Thinking It Over"
I'm having some difficulty remembering
last night's dream. What I do remember is being somewhere (a
distant aunt's house?) and there was an easy-chair that I kept
focusing on, staring at it, not really feeling comfortable with it
for some reason. Then another segment of the dream involved my
friend Craig (whom I haven't spoken to in some time). He was
sewing something, and getting frustrated. Then he was hugging
me, and telling me how much he missed me and how good it felt to
hold me. And I felt the same way. Interpretation:
I think this dream has something to do with last night's
events. I picked a fight with Robin, I was feeling moody and
'emotionally messy' for whatever reason. We made up (as we
usually do) but I'm still not pleased with my behaviour. It
played heavily on my mind throughout the night. So,
looking at my dream: To see a chair symbolizes a need to sit back
and contemplate before proceeding with a situation. Sewing
machines represent making amends with others. Hugging
symbolizes my loving and caring nature (for the most part I am),
that I'm holding someone/something close to my heart, or it could
also mean I need to be more affectionate. Tying
this all in together: I've been contemplating some rather serious
actions regarding my relationship lately, not all of them
pleasant. I really need to figure out what I want in a
relationship, but I know in my heart that my boyfriend is a loving
and wonderful person and I should acknowledge what I have in front
of me, and appreciate him and show him my true affections instead of
holding things back or sabotaging things (which I've done in the
past).
02.18.04 "The Good Old Club Days"
I dreamt I was at a night club in Deep
Cove (!!!). I was on my bike and a little anxious about
getting home because it was getting dark. Before I entered the
club, I saw someone with their dog on the mountainside. It was
a large, energetic German Shepherd and it was fetching a ball.
When I went inside, all my fabulously festive friends were
there. The DJ was playing club classics (from early 90s, like
Snap's "Rhythm is the Dancer"). I was having fun,
but then I noticed that most of my friends had headed out. I
remember talking to Aly last, he was going to be hanging out for
awhile. The last feeling I remember was wanting to head out
because I was ready to go home at that point. Interpretation:
Apparently, dogs are generally good omens and represent a pleasing
social life and good friends. In addition, music represents
good luck. All true so far - I'm blessed with a wonderful,
supportive network of beautiful friends. But the fact that I
wanted to leave a nightclub that was playing music that I used to
enjoy in my more youthful, club days - well, I think that's speaking
once more about progressing on to the next phase of life.
Of
course my current friends will always play an important role in my
life. However many of them still go to the bars every weekend,
and as I look towards my future, I may not be a part of their
lifestyle in that effect. But that's not a bad thing, it's all
about growth, growing apart in some respects while still staying
close.
02.17.04 "My Cat is Me"
So, no more nocturnal anxieties (at
least for the last couple of days). I've been getting 7 hours
of uninterrupted sleep lately - sweet! Last night, I had a
feel-good but bizarre dream. I dreamt I was holding my cat
Calvin, and he was talking to me. Yes, we were conversing in
English, not telepathically. But then he transformed into a
little person, almost like a living doll, but it wasn't creepy at
all. Then he jumped out of my arms, walked towards the screen
door, opened it, and walked away. I remember feeling giddy and
proud (that Calvin opened the door, never mind the fact that he
could speak English). Interpretation:
Okay then.... So, again, imagery alone is not enough.
Cats in dreams generally represent treachery and bad luck (oh no!),
but being a cat-lover Calvin could also represent me meeting an
attractive person who will become my mate (uh oh, look out
Robin). Dolls in general represent the desire to be young
again, and the fact that the doll came to life signifies a wish to
be something different.
Hmmmm. So, putting this all
together, this is my analysis - Calvin has been with me for many
years (since 1990), and he represents a more youthful me. The
fact that he came to life and walked away (but didn't abandon me)
and I felt positive about it (calm, happy, proud) leads me to
believe that I'm ready to embrace a more mature stage of my
life. This ties in to my recent thoughts (well, more like
obsessions) about babies, biological clocks, etc. But I think
my dream tells me that I should be happy about it, and not stress
too much about growing older....
02.13.04 "Bears the Animals, Not the People"
I had yet another anxiety dream last
night, but this one involved bears. I don't recall many bear
dreams in the past? Anyway, I was at a river with Mark and
Brent, and we were wading out into a shallow pool. Across the
water we could see a couple of park rangers who were accompanied by
some dogs. There were several brown bears who were trying to
get to the water, but the rangers and dogs kept them at bay. I
remember being scared, as it was very noisy (growling, barking) and
I wanted to leave. Mark and Brent seemed much more relaxed,
which was calming to a degree.
Interpretation:
I was a bit
stumped with this one, so I looked it up. Apparently bears can
represent a rival for a loved one. Unlike the spider
representations that I often encounter in dreams (see below), bears
represent a valid fear (in my opinion). The only rivalry I can
identify in my life right now would be my situation with my
boyfriend. But, not to give away too many personal details,
I'll just say that I'm going to think more about my perceived
'rival' and how I really feel about the situation. On the
upside, the fact that Mark and Brent were so calm and confident is a
good sign for me.....
02.12.04 "Spiders"
I had another spider dream this
week. This time, it was a large, black, and very hairy.
I could even see its fangs. I was terrified. I was in a
log cabin (which I think was supposed to be my boyfriend's house)
with a couple of friends. I vividly remember one part where it
jumped off a back of a chair and flew through the air straight at
me. I think I woke up shortly after that.
Interpretation:
I don't have
recurring dreams in the classic sense. But I do have recurring
themes in my dreams - spiders and sometimes other insects.
Often they are chasing me, causing me anxiety in some form.
The dream analysis experts claim that spiders are an omen of good
luck. But I think in my case they represent my anxieties and
how I've blown my fears out of proportion. Now, whenever I
have these types of dreams, I look at what is currently
causing me stress/anxiety in my life and I try to put things in
perspective and make an effort not to dwell to much on things and
the unknown.
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